Parents Who Teach Kids 6 Old-Fashioned Life Skills Usually Raise Smart & Resilient Adults

Parents are pressured to ensure their kids grow up in a culture-rich environment, but what if I told you that you could teach your kids about fine arts, take them on wild adventures, and greatly increase their odds of academic success, all from the comforts of your living room? 

Among other old-fashioned skills worth teaching, there are huge benefits to reading to your kids out loud. Reading aloud creates higher intelligence and expanded vocabulary, plus you get to spend time connecting with your kids. But that's just one skill parents teach that raises intelligent kids; these old-fashioned habits help build curious, capable minds for life.

Parents who teach kids these old-fashioned skills raise smart and resilient adults:

1. 'If you can read, the world is your oyster'

Think about that last book you read to your kids. It was loaded with descriptive new words that aren't used in everyday language. As humans, we automate for efficiency. That means we use the same types of words day-to-day, which limits our kids' ability to expand their vocabulary.

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2. 'Experiences are just as important as extracurriculars'

Signing kids up for piano, tennis, and French is wonderful, but do you think that a kid with 10 extracurricular activities before the age of three is going to be super far ahead of the kid who sits on his mom's lap in a park somewhere and reads? Nope.

Simple activities like reading have been lost in the mad scramble to provide one experience after another for our kids. Sure, it’s fine to sign your four-year-old up for soccer, but don’t forget to weave in the more traditional parent activities. We can’t keep rolling out big moments if we want our kids to find success and happiness with the smaller things in life.

3. 'Put down the iPad'

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Now that the bulk of the toy market is battery-operated, your son doesn’t have to come up with the choo-choo train sound — his toy does it for him. With tablets plaguing childhoods across the globe, instant gratification is rewarded daily. Gone are the days when we closed our eyes in the middle of a story and pictured what the author was describing. We have Netflix do it for us. 

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4. 'Boredom is good for you'

Is this what good parenting looks like? Which do you think is more beneficial long-term: The ability to sign “I’m thirsty” by six months or having a stellar vocabulary a few months later? I know, it's super uncomfortable to sit down and read a book. It's uncomfortable to be bored. We say we want to slow down and be able to curl up with a good book, but when we have time, it’s impossible!. Our bodies freak out with the lack of stress, and we end up finding some minuscule task that 'needs' to be done.

But the truth is, you're setting your kid up if you book her Google Calendar like she’s a popular CEO; you’re grooming her to be unable to entertain herself, use her imagination, be bored (which leads to creativity), and enjoy the present moment.

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5. 'Use your imagination' 

If your kids are older, reintroduce them to reading in a fun way. Make it fun! Pick up Where the Wild Things Are, and read it under a bridge, or pick up a book about the invention of ice cream and have a cone under a big tree, or pick up a book about bugs and then try to catch some.

If you want your kids to have expansive imaginations, you need to help them train those imaginations. Video games and TV shows turn off the imagination. (I don’t care what Nick Jr. says. It’s killing your kid's imagination — turn it off.)

6. 'Stop rushing through life'

Retrain yourself and teach your kids how to sit and read. The power of reading to your kids is truly endless, so before you rush to check the community calendar for the next round of activities, hit up your local library and let their imaginations take them wherever they wish to go.

Parents teaching their children to slow down foster their ability to self-regulate, which involves managing one's emotions and behaviors in response to different situations. Self-regulation is absolutely crucial for healthy development — and for raising smart, resilient kids.

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Jessica M. Miller is a relationship, personal development, and motivational coach. She's the author of Back 2 Love and How to Start a Mental Health Private Practice.