People Who Waste Zero Time On Bad Relationships Casually Bail Out When They See 7 Signs
Marcus Queiroga Silva | CanvaLife is a series of challenges, and there are some essential qualities your relationship needs in order to survive them. If these don't exist, you have very little chance of living happily in your long-term relationship.
That's why people who know what they want waste very little time on any relationship that doesn't meet their needs.
People who waste zero time on bad relationships casually bail out when they see these signs:
1. There's a lack of trust...
Does your partner have your back when it counts, or are they always taking everyone else's side but yours? When your partner is telling you he has to work late, do you believe him?
Trust is necessary to make a relationship last, otherwise, you'll spend the rest of your life with someone who, every time they speak, you'll never be able to believe them. According to research, a trustworthy partner will behave in ways that are both competent and cooperative.
2. ... and a lack of respect
There must be mutual respect, or a relationship won't last. Do you respect the decisions your partner makes? Do you value his opinion on important decisions?
3. They don't seem to actually like their partner
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Do you actually like the person you are in a relationship with? Do they like you? When one of you is having an off day, is the other available to pick up the slack?
Do they show that they appreciate you for who you are, including the things you do for them?
Research shows that expressing, and showing gratitude for those we care about can improve the relationship by bringing us closer to the other individual, and leading to sustainability in our relationships. Without that, a relationship won't survive.
4. The love feels shallow and conditional
Do you and your partner love each other no matter what? Or are either of you with the other just because it's convenient, or because they offer you something?
Love shouldn't be filled with conditions.
5. They want their partner to change
Do you feel your partner accepts who you are and you accept who they are, no matter what? Are there things about their past that bother you, or you can't get over?
6. They make their partner feel inadequate
Can you be yourself with your partner, or do you feel you have to constantly hide yourself? You're scared to tell them about your past or open up because they might judge you.
Being comfortable, not just with yourself, but also with a partner will allow you to be vulnerable and reap all the rewards love can offer you.
7. There's a significant lack of vision
Can you see yourself growing old with your partner, or this is just a summer fling to you? Do you want the same things in life, or does this relationship have an expiration date?
A relationship requires two different people coming together who want the same thing, if there's any kind of confusion or uncertainty on what the future will look like for you two, it's time to end the relationship.
These are the building blocks of a functional relationship. You must have a strong foundation to build upon. If you don't, the relationship will not withhold the stresses and conflicts that are inevitable. Seek help for guidance on this if you are not sure.
Jennifer Rosvally, MSW, LCSW, is a psychotherapist in private psychotherapy practice since 1986.
