People Who Are Naturally Rude But Have Tons Of Close Friends Usually Have 11 Distinct Traits
Miguel Valls | ShutterstockSome people come across as rude and a little rough around the edges rather than being warm and inviting. But one of the most surprising things about these kinds of people is the fact that they tend to have deeply loyal friends who enjoy being around them.
The contrast can seem confusing, but friendships are often built on so much more than just perfect manners. Finding friends may be challenging for them, but once they do, their friendships often enrich their lives in ways that go beyond words.
The traits of people who seem rude but have tons of close friends:
1. They're brutally honest
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These individuals are usually the type who say exactly what's on their minds at all times, without softening their delivery. It can come across as rude to strangers or to more sensitive people. But their close friends learn to appreciate their brutal honesty.
A study from the University of Rochester revealed that brutal honesty in relationships has significant benefits, even during the most challenging of conversations. They rarely sugarcoat something because they know their friends need to hear it like it is.
2. They tease people as a form of affection
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A lot of the time, naturally rude people tend to bond with others through acts of teasing and roasting rather than being overly sentimental. Outsiders may sometimes get offended, but they only mean it in good fun. They use their dry, sarcastic humor to create connections with people. It's rare that they'll actually be vulnerable, especially if they already struggle with openly expressing their emotions.
Their friendships, though, always feel really fun and exciting because they're not afraid to poke a little fun at people. Teasing often gets a bad rep, but it really does strengthen bonds and bring people closer together.
3. They don't obsess over being liked by everyone
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Something refreshing about these individuals is that they're not concerned with how they're perceived. They usually just say what they want and move on with their day. That confidence can come across as arrogant, but it also means they're incredibly secure in who they are and make no apologies for it.
They've realized that constantly caring about what others think will only make their own mental health worse. Because of their ambivalence toward others' opinions, their friendships tend to form naturally because they aren't pretending to be anyone but themselves.
4. They're fiercely loyal once they care about someone
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Even if they come off as being cold and rude in everyday moments and interactions, they become incredibly protective of the people in their inner circle. They're usually the person who will defend their friend to the death during any moment of conflict, and they definitely don't stand for anyone talking negatively about those they care about.
Their loyalty makes it easy for them to form friendships, as others know they'll never betray them. The best friendships aren't just about the things that you can do for each other, but about being there for each other as well.
5. They're dependable in emergencies
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They may complain the entire time about having to help you, but they'll definitely still show up. Their version of kindness goes hand in hand with how loyal they are. The friends in their lives quickly learn to tune out their tone because they know the action will speak for itself.
Their version of love is showing up in the middle of the night when a friend calls in a panic and needs support. They don't get overwhelmed or anxious either. These individuals can be quite calm in moments of stress, which is why they are usually the first people you tend to call when you're going through something.
6. They hate forced small talk
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They'd much rather skip all the talk about the weather and get into the nitty-gritty of a conversation. They like talking about real things rather than superficial topics just to pass the time. That can make them seem like a lot to handle, but it also means their friendships deepen quickly.
They will ask the direct questions others are afraid to ask, with little warning at all. But their friends tend to appreciate just how cutthroat they are about getting to the root of things and how honest their conversations can be.
7. They respect boundaries
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These individuals tend to be extremely particular about their own boundaries, which is why they give others the same level of respect. They're never going to pressure someone into doing something they don't want to do, because they would absolutely hate it if the reverse happened to them.
If you tell them no, they take that no at face value and move on. Their friends automatically feel so much safer in their company because they know they can trust them wholeheartedly.
8. They're not afraid of awkward moments
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Silence doesn't scare these individuals at all, and neither does conflict. They're quite comfortable saying the things that most people might be scared to say or avoiding entirely. In fact, they almost seem entertained during the really awkward moments, especially since they tend to point out the tension while everyone else actively ignores it.
They never let things get brushed under the rug because they know that only through those uncomfortable conversations can things be resolved.
9. They don't make everything about themselves
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Even if they may sound rude to others, they're not self-absorbed in the slightest. They don't need constant praise and validation from others to feel good about themselves. They also know not to make every single situation about themselves.
Leaving room for others to shine is something they're incredibly good at, and that's why their friends usually feel comfortable sharing their success and achievements with them. The spotlight is big enough for them and everyone else they care about.
10. They don't disappear when life gets messy
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When things get hard and overwhelming, these individuals still manage to show up. They aren't there only for the fun moments and then disappear when the going gets tough. If their friends need some emotional support, they will drop everything to be there.
That consistency makes their friends know they can always depend on them, through thick and thin. Complicated feelings and emotions don't scare them away or make them want to retreat.
11. They rarely hold grudges
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Since they tend to speak their frustrations almost immediately, they don't tend to bottle things up. Arguments with them may seem intense in the moment, but once a resolution is reached, they move on quickly. They aren't the type to drop passive-aggressive comments or make snide remarks because they feel slighted.
If they still have a problem, they'll voice it so that things can be good once again. They've mastered the art of actually forgiving people, which helps them from spiraling into a negative train of thought.
Nia Tipton is a staff writer with a bachelor’s degree in creative writing and journalism who covers news and lifestyle topics that focus on psychology, relationships, and the human experience.
