People Who Were Taught Good Etiquette Usually Say 8 Phrases In Casual Conversation
Everett Collection | ShutterstockThese days, it feels like a lot of people ignore the importance of etiquette, but people who learned good manners have no problem letting it show in the ways they talk to people.
Good manners are actually considered a social skill, so anyone who was taught them is at an advantage. These phrases seem to be used more rarely now, but they’re an automatic indication that someone really did grow up learning how to do things the proper way.
People say these phrases in casual conversation when they were taught good etiquette:
1. ‘How are you doing?’
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It’s obvious that some people ask how others are doing just because they feel obligated to. It takes a special person to ask how someone is out of genuine curiosity and make it clear that they want a true answer.
Because so many people say this phrase automatically, it can easily be overlooked as a sign of good manners. But people who say it seriously were taught to care about people. Showing kindness and support is one of the best ways to strengthen a friendship, and they’re clearly being intentional about that.
2. ‘Excuse me’
A lot of people just interrupt a conversation or push past anyone who’s in their way without giving it much thought. It takes someone with good etiquette skills to take a step back and approach people with courtesy, even though it means giving up a few extra seconds.
Saying “excuse me” doesn’t immediately make someone polite since there are plenty of situations where it shouldn’t be used. This is another phrase that context clues can help you decode. When someone is truly authentic, it’s not hard to tell.
3. ‘I’m sorry’
Apologizing is an important skill to develop. The simple act of saying “sorry” can be very meaningful and help heal broken relationships.
Polite people don’t just reserve this phrase for deep moments, though. They’re just as quick to apologize when they accidentally bump into someone else or step directly in front of them. These folks are remembered for going above and beyond to be respectful at all times, not just when they need to address a serious issue.
4. ‘Have a great day’
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Wishing someone a good day doesn’t seem like a big deal, but it really is if you think about it. When a conversation ends without everyone involved saying something like this, it feels incomplete and awkward.
This is another phrase people often say without really thinking about it, but that doesn’t make it less important. Telling someone to have a good day, even if it’s just a reflex, shows that person learned about good etiquette and took those lessons to heart.
5. ‘Can I bring anything?’
Etiquette expert Jodi Smith said, “When someone is kind enough to extend an invitation, you should be kind enough to bring along a hostess gift.” Unfortunately, there are a lot of people who don’t understand this. They’re happy to accept an invitation for a party or meal, but they don’t stop to consider how they could return that kindness.
Well-mannered people would never make this mistake. Whoever is hosting will probably turn down their offer to bring something, but that won’t stop them from bringing it up. Honestly, a lot of the things that get brought along in these situations aren’t a huge deal, but they still show someone’s appreciation.
6. ‘If it’s not too much trouble’
Asking another person to do something might not seem like a big deal, especially if it’s something that doesn’t require much effort on their part. For example, asking someone to share a mutual acquaintance’s phone number couldn’t really be described as asking for a big favor.
That doesn’t stop respectful people from showing the other person that their kindness means a lot to them. Including a phrase like “if it’s not too much trouble” with a request makes it clear that they aren’t demanding anything. Some people might find it unnecessary, but they would never think of leaving it unsaid.
7. ‘After you’
A lot of people would probably claim “after you” is such an old-fashioned phrase that it doesn’t need to be said. Those who understand etiquette feel completely different. They have no problem letting another person go through a door before them because it’s just a nice thing to do.
The interesting thing about this kind of phrase is that it really doesn’t have to be said out loud. Someone could easily indicate that another person should step in front of them with a small gesture. But people remember the little things more than they realize. They’ll catch onto that comment and think about how courteous it was, and they’ll associate that with the person who said it.
8. ‘Thank you’
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This phrase is a simple building block of good manners that we’re all taught to use from a really young age, but some people seem to forget about it. There are few things as awkward as one person doing something nice for another only for the recipient to move on without acknowledging it.
Someone who was taught good etiquette would never leave another person hanging like that. When they take the time to express their gratitude, they’re actually rewiring their brain so that they can better deal with challenges. But they’re probably more interested in how much hearing “thank you” will surely mean to the other person.
Mary-Faith Martinez is a writer with a bachelor’s degree in English and Journalism who covers news, psychology, lifestyle, and human interest topics.

