Emotionally Mature Men Are Able To Do 9 Things Immature Guys Could Never
EugeneEdge | ShutterstockThere are stark differences between emotionally mature men, and those who… well... aren’t. For the sake of illustrating these differences in this article, we will refer to the emotionally immature as "boys," and the emotionally mature as "men."
This is a list of nine great points from my good friend, Adam LoDolce. For those of you unfamiliar, Adam has been featured by multiple major media outlets such as Cosmopolitan, MTV, CNN, Glamour, and quite a few more.
Remember, age is merely a number, actions define who a man is. But here’s the problem: most women spend their time trying to change boys into men. Well, that ends today. If you’re dating a boy right now, it’s up to you to be a woman and move on with your life.
Here are 9 charming signs you’re in love with a man, not a boy:
1. They have the hard conversations, even when it's hard
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Even the best relationships have friction. You’re going to do or say something your partner doesn't like, it’s just inevitable.
Boys respond to being hurt by being passive-aggressive, whereas a mature man will have a productive conversation, even if it’s a little awkward.
Communication is the heart of a relationship, as they say, and research supports that. So why would you want to be someone who can't?
2. They invest time and energy into relationships instead of just hooking up
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There’s a moment in every man’s life when he realizes that being in a relationship makes him significantly happier than chasing tail (so to speak) every night.
If you’re only hearing from him at 1 a.m. on a Saturday night, he’s not ready to give up his toys. Move on and find yourself a grown man. If you're that guy, remember that you can be more.
3. They pay genuine compliments, even when shallow ones suffice
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Boys give shallow compliments, while mature men learn about someone so they can offer a genuine one.
There’s a huge difference between delivering a compliment to get something and delivering a compliment to give something. Mature men are givers because they know a mature woman will reciprocate.
4. They work hard to build a future, even when being selfish is easier
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Boys live day-by-day while men build something bigger for themselves and the people they love.
When you’re only focused on making yourself happy, you can party every night and be lazy every day. Once you realize that other people are relying on you, you’re willing to make the sacrifices you need to support your family.
5. They love and respect intelligent women, even when their peers are intimidated
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Boys are intimidated by smart women, but mature men are interested in a woman's intelligence.
If he’s insecure about his intellect, he won’t risk it with a smart girl. The boy will stay in his comfort zone, whereas a mature man wants the challenge of a smart woman.
6. They only make promises when they can keep them
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Boys make promises they can’t keep, but mature men say only what they mean.
One of the biggest mistakes I’ve ever made was telling a woman I loved her when I didn’t mean it. I was a scared little boy trying to make a girl happy.
A mature man will tell a woman how he feels when he feels it. And if it’s not there, he won’t make it up.
7. They see how scary rejection is, but they take the risk anyway
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Boys avoid any chance of rejection, while men face their fears and go for it. Are they scared? Yeah. But mature men face their fears.
Here’s the thing, both men and boys hate getting rejected. No matter who you are, rejection sucks. The only difference is that a mature man will push through his fears and go for it anyway because you’re worth it.
8. They know what matters most and prioritize it, instead of focusing on cheap thrills
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Boys don’t set priorities, but truly mature men realize what’s most important and makes the person he loves a real priority.
A mature man wants to spend his time with the people he cares about. And if he’s dating you, he cares about you. He will want to be with you and only you.
9. They encourage and support their partners, even when others might flake out
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Boys put you down when you're growing and becoming your most powerful self. Mature men encourage and support you.
Scared little boys will try to drag a woman down with them as a defense mechanism. A mature man understands that he will grow as a man if his woman is growing as a woman.
James Michael Sama is a speaker, author, and personal development coach.
